On the 32nd mark

I'm guilty of being forgetful. I remember during our courtships days, I told Shujin that to be my boyfriend means suffering... because I am SO forgetful, I might forget that He is my boyfriend.
Luckily I did not forget about THAT but from time to time, I always forget our official day. (The 5th day of the month signifies the day when we are officially "magnobyo").

But I am very thankful that he is not taking it against me whenever I forget it. I'm so lucky, isn't it? *grins*

For almost 32 months of being "together". Almost 3/4 of which I forgot our official day.
To make up with him, I wanted to reminensce those days when we are still literally together (now we are more than a thousand miles apart).

2007
2008

2009


2010... :)


:o:
:o: :o: :o: :o: :o:
:o: :o: :o: :o:

DIY | Monograms (First Batch)

FIRST ATTEMPT...

Being sick for 3 days depresses me.

... I hate lying on bed the whole day

... I hate taking medications

... I hate being unproductive

Well, today buti na lang I am well enough to at least move my fingers... and start excreting my creative juices. At least, I can be productive naman.

FIRST DIY for our wedding - MONOGRAM

Maybe I'll make 3 more Monogram... ^_^

Parang wala pa kasi dito ang The One. Hehehe.

I'll ask H2B to choose or to give some input first before I finalize the design.

Final Notes:
R for Roland
B for Bea
M for Manuel
Date and Venue - still undecided. That's why I cannot incorporate it with the monograms I made.

Motif:
Shades of Pink
Chocolate Brown
A small tint of pale blue

Program used: Adobe Photoshop

Seeing the 'END RESULTS' blindfolded

It was a TOUGH week.

Many happenings made me feel "uber" sad.
1. The fact that our wedding preparation is as good as zero. The wedding is in less than 10 months yet we have not started anything but pure research. Its a mere BLANK piece of paper.
2. Financial dilemma
3. Work related issues I need to deal with

As of now, the whole wedding preparation is not yet rolling (as it supposed to be).
Actually, we have not finalized the dates because we have Plan A, B, C, D...

Present Situation: Shujin is in the Philippines. I am here in Dubai. We are thousand miles and four (4) hours away from each other.

Plan A: Before April, Shujin will be hired here (in Dubai) then we will get married before the date of his departure. A very simple wedding.
Chances: Most likely (I'm claiming it)

Plan B: If he will not find any job before April, the wedding will be set on October.Then, he'll come here with me through Wife's VISA.
Chances: More likely

Plan C: He will no longer come here. The wedding will be set on October. I will finish the contract. Then, I will return in the Philippines.
Chances: More likely
Plan D: He will apply for other location abroad... If hired I will follow him.
Chances: Most likely

Given this situation, I, as an "OC" individual suffered to maintain my sanity. One of the things I did, was "to manipulate everything". Trusting that I COULD DO IT on my own. So I worked "hard days night" to no avail, manipulating everything.
The perfect example: I was VERY guilty of pushing Shujin so hard. Yes, we were praying but I was trying to control the situation. I did not surrender everything to God. I trusted my ability to find the job for him; relied on other people; but I did let God.

HOW REAL IS "MY" FAITH? (I was trying to "control my life")

So what is wrong with "controlling or taking charge" of your own life?
It is wrong in a sense that by doing so, we are simply doing an act of ingratitude to the Creator or disobedience to the Master.And a merely saying you're doubting God.

TRUSTING OURSELVES/ MANIPULATING OUR GOALS
=
disregarding GOD'S WILL is an act of ingratitude and disobedience

(and I am guilty beyond unreasonable doubt)

Because I wanted to see the "END RESULTS" immediately. Instead of leaning to God's will, I was exerting too much effort to get the results I wanted. See how bad it was? Like having a broken machine who is in dire need of repair but I keep on pushing it to its limit.

But, thank God He reminded me of His faithfulness and love. I was very overwhelmed on how He has spoken. He showed me how He is IN CONTROL.

These trials are just mere instruments in order that I will be a "better individual". It is written, everyone has his or her own "trouble" but God is in CONTROL.

"...In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." (John 16:33)

Indeed, God will not give me problems I cannot bear; and taking into consideration that these problems are 'what is common to man'. (So the problem I am facing must have happened to another individual; and guess what - he or she managed to overcome it).
God is simply amazing, isn't it?

"No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it". (1 Corinthians 10:13)

Though I cannot see the end results I know God in will guide me.

It is very difficult but I will never give up.I am surrendering everything to Him. My Master knows what is the best for me.He will provide the necessary means in order to fulfill the plan He has for me.

I may plan my course, yet God will determine which steps I should take (Proverbs 16:9)

In lieu to "our wedding" preparations, the situation is out of our hands.

I am letting God take charge. May my plans be in accordance to His will.

I do believe that he will surely give us the NECESSARY PROVISION AND GRACE we needed in order to push through this "once in a lifetime... commitment to forever day - WEDDING DAY".

I am blindfolded - but I can clearly see the END RESULT;
it is no doubt, far better than what I AM PLANNING OR EXPECTING.

Money Talk: The Wedding

An excerpt from the Inquirer.net article "Dream wedding or starter fund? (How to make the right choice)". A perfect eye-opener for those who are preparing their wedding.
Its quite difficult for a couple to decide whether to have a simple wedding or to have "the" dream wedding. Actually, we are currently facing this dilema. It's really difficult. Did I already said "difficult".

Here it was presented in an objective manner, the pros and cons of the the simple wedding and the dream wedding.

Dream Wedding

Advantages:
1. You can make your fiancée's dream come true.
2. You can invite as many family and friends as you like.
3. Your wedding can be guaranteed to be unforgettable.
4. You will make many people happy.

Disadvantages:
1. It may hurt your pocket in a major way.
2. There will be too many details to look into, thus compounding stress for everyone involved.
3. If you don't have a big savings fund started, you might have to live from paycheck to paycheck after the wedding.
4. Worse, if you don't have enough budget for your dream wedding at this time, you may be saddled with debts to pay your wedding suppliers long after the wedding is over.

Simple Wedding

Advantages:
1. You'll begin your married life with some savings which you can use for starting a fund to build your own home, or for other priorities.
2. You won't be plagued with debts to pay your wedding suppliers.
3. You'll be able to start off your married life on a good positive note.
4. You're ready for any emergency crisis that may arise, even the day after the wedding.

Disadvantages:
1. Your fiancée may not have the wedding of her dreams.
2. You may have to invite only a limited number of guests, which may result in resentment for some people.

"Simple but memorable wedding"

Is it possible to still have a good wedding on a limited budget?

Here are a few tips on how to do that:
1. Settle on a guest list comprising only your closest family and friends.
2. Find a venue that would not be too costly, yet is beautiful and appropriate. Look for an intimate church, a garden, or an events place that charges reasonably.
3. Book wedding suppliers who may not be that well-known but are reliable and good too. Ask around for referrals and look at their sample products.
4. Enlist the help of family and friends who will be able contribute to the wedding preparations: emcee the reception, do the invitation design, coordinate the wedding day itself, etcetera. Their help will be a labor of love and a wonderful gift to you.
5. Save on your honeymoon

*thinking*
*pondering*
*contemplating*

Am I already convinced to have SIMPLE YET MEMORABLE wedding?
Maybe I should start giving up the nice-haves...
or maybe we can still push through the "dream" wedding...

*thinking*
*pondering*
*contemplating*


Reference:
Take Charge: Dream wedding or starter fund? (How to make the right choice) http://business.inquirer.net/money/personalfinance/view/20090615-210668/Dream-wedding-or-starter-fund

Money Talk

I just want ot repost these articles about "handling finances/ money" for newly weds.
Many times issues about money has become the root of misunderstanding, hurts, and separation. So we must "TAKE CHARGE". We need to control our finances and not the other way around.

TAKE CHARGE
Money Talk for Newlyweds

INQUIRER.net
First Posted 21:31:00 06/23/2009

Filed Under: Family, Economy and Business and Finance

Q: My husband and I have been married for only six months and already we’re fighting about money. He spends money on computer equipment and personal gadgets, while I spend money on household goods, which we share. I don't want to nit pick but I feel as if a gap has opened up between us. How can I fix this? — Angela

A: Money problems can be a real headache, especially in a marriage. You feel that you are spending more for the two of you (by buying household goods) but your husband spends only for himself (the computer equipment and gadgets). There is indeed a communication gap, but like most gaps, this can be bridged if both parties acknowledge the problem and make an effort to address it.

Find time to sit down with your husband when he’s not in a bad mood. Start by saying how much you appreciate the fact that you are now married and living together on your own (if you are indeed living on your own. The point is to start the conversation on a positive note.).

Be honest about how you feel regarding the setup in your family when it comes to spending. Begin your statements with “I” (example: I feel sad when…) instead of “You” (example: You spend too much on…). The latter one is accusing and will put your husband on defensive mode, which will not really help in resolving the conflict.

Hear his side out without interrupting. Then summarize what you both just said by saying, “So if I understand right, I feel … and you feel…” Bring the discussion to focus on your money goals for the family. Is it to save for an emergency fund, save for retirement, or save for a new home? Ask yourselves if the current setup is bringing you closer to those goals.

According to Citibank's Vice President for Consumer Education Aneth Ng-Lim, "most couples dream of having a three-bedroom house, good college education for the kids, and a vacation home in Tagaytay. But they need to take concrete steps to turn these into realities."

Brainstorm on what you both can do to take control of your money and put you on the road to reaching your financial goals. Here are some ideas:

• Commit to have a common fund to which you will both contribute. This fund will be used to pay bills and other expenses to be incurred in running your home. Citibank's Lim suggests opening a joint checking account so you can keep this fund separate from other funds. Lim explained that having "a joint bank account will allow either one of you to have easy access to these funds.”

• Make a household budget to determine how much it costs to run your household every month. Based on your income, you can decide how much each of you should contribute to this fund. Or your husband may decide to pay everything, in which case, he should put up the total money for the budget monthly.

• Assign one person to handle the common fund. He/she will be responsible for paying all the bills on time and making sure your spending is kept within budget.

• Allow each one a personal fund, which can be used as he/she wants. There should be a ceiling for this fund every month, or you can make it a percentage of the take-home pay. You may use this, for instance, on spa or salon services, while he can use it for gadgets. If your husband needs to buy additional computer equipment that is over his budget for his personal fund for the month, he should save the money meant for the current month and succeeding ones until he has saved enough to buy what he wants to buy. The same goes for you.

• Go over your household budget every month and see where you have overspent. If you have extra cash left over, decide together what to do with it. You can go out for dinner or watch a movie or save it for a bigger treat next month.

• Make sure you prioritize essential financial expenses such as life insurance and health insurance. Shop around among insurance companies for the best insurance product that suits you. Nowadays, life insurance comes with added benefits you can choose from, among them are investment options, hospitalization coverage, return of premiums, etcetera.

• Ensure that your family is saving up for a six- to eight-month emergency fund. This will be very handy should something unexpected happen: a job loss or illness needing hospitalization for instance.

• Since you are already talking money, talk about retirement too. At what age do you plan to retire? Set an appointment with a financial planner to discuss the many ways you can save for your retirement. With the financial planner’s help, you will also be able to determine how much money you need to save between now and your retirement. Citibank is available for this discussion with you for free.

Money problems can be dealt with as long as both partners commit to be open in talking about this. Make sure that communication lines are kept open throughout your marriage as more challenges will come your way.

In other words:
(1) proper communication
(2) have a joint account
(3) budget and budget and budget
(4) deligation and responsibility
(5) balance the ledgers... meaning review the monthly expenditures
(6) going solo... have your own personal accounts
(7) prioritize (and get health and life insurance)
(8) savings.... savings... savings... SAVE
(9) long term goals = retirement



Reference:
http://business.inquirer.net/money/personalfinance/view/20090623-212056/Money-Talk-for-Newlyweds

Time-Space Warp

Today, Shujin is not feeling well. He got a mild fever (according to him... but I guess its not a mild one). He's alone in his boarding house. No one is taking care of him.

Well, given this condition... I'm not worried but sad because I am not there to give him the TLC he needs. All I can do is to say a prayer that God would heal him. I also asked God that He would give the "desire" of our hearts... to be together once again.

Being in a long-distance relationship continuously cultivates our love for each other. Yes, there are "a lot" of difficulties but we are taking every circumstance as a challenge or an opportunity to develop and to mature.

Though a lot of people (with the same setup) cannot and will not survive this type of relationship, I am happy to say that we are lucky.

OF LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIPS...

Difficulties, struggles and hardships

People who are involved in a "long distance" relationship do not only suffer from the separation (in terms of proximity); but they also need to endure the lost time (of being together).

Aside from time and space constraints, both parties must learn how to relay his or her thoughts in a way that the other person will understand. Plus, establishing the foundation of your relationship is a must.

Dealing with time and space constraints

With these problems, you need to step-up and to find a way to work around the situation.

(1) Communication

"COMMUNICATION" is a vital factor in a long-distance relationship.

One must convey the "message" clearly. Both need to speak the same vocabulary.

(2) Quality Time

You can still spend time with each other through proper scheduling of the following activities: a one-minute call, a SMS message, letter through email, or video chat.

Call: Hearing the voice of that someone, especially during the "downtime" gives them an instant energy booster they badly needed.

SMS or Text Message: a short-message of love, encouragement, or inspiration will definitely make their day better.

Email: Just like writing your thoughts and experiences throughout the day (like a diary) and then sending it through email - they will surely know how are you doing? Telling them what are you experiencing in a daily basis will make the other person know your whereabouts. And when the time comes when you will be together... it will be as if you are not away from each other because you never missed any minor or major happenings.

Video Chat: you are far from each other... yet so near. 'nuff said.

(3) Praying

Establishing a tradition of praying together works wonders.

Based on experience, we won't last a day without saying our prayers together.

Matthew 18:20

"For where two or three are gathered together in my name,

there am I in the midst of them."

When Christ is in the CENTER of your relationship, it can never go wrong.

(4) Foundations

Love, Trust and Commitment

Love him every day, trust him always, stay committed...

Love her every day, trust her always, stay committed...

Though there are a lot of temptations around.... you won't give in

for you love her so much (and she loves you too)

she trust you that much (and you are trusting her too)

...and you are commited with each other.

Every day, the challenge we face moves to a higher level. I just pray that God will always upheld us through our journey. May He never cease to pour out his blessings and grace for us to endure these difficulties.

Final notes

In the Metal Hero Series Shaider, every time Fuuma Lei-ar's monsters are nearly defeated she uses Time-Space Warp. She uses this power to manipulate the time and space in order to work in our own advantage. But I hope that we will NOT use that type of power (of handling things in our own hands) and disregard God's control over our lives.

Shujin & I are claiming God's promise in our relationship:

Though it it lingers, we should wait patiently for His perfect time. He promised it will come and it will not be delayed. (Habakkuk 2:10).

of goals and of new year's traditions

"goal"

Pronunciation: \ˈgōl, chiefly Northern especially in 1b & 3a also ˈgül\

Function: noun

Etymology: Middle English gol boundary, limit. Date: 1531

1 a : the terminal point of a race b : an area to be reached safely in children's games

2 : the end toward which effort is directed : aim

(Reference:Merriam-Webster Online)

Yearly, it has been a tradition for both Shujiin and I to came up with our list of short term or long term goal for the "new year". For this year, even though we are not together (a thousand miles away apart), we made a way to practice tradition. Thanks to the Internet/ Skype's Video Calls. ^_^

Our Goals for this Year

1. to get married

Still, we are undecided with the wedding date. We are considering a lot of factors. Hopefully, it will be on the last quarter of this year.

2. zero credits/ debt free year

Do I need to elaborate. More into savings than expenses. Actually, I do not know how can attain this while preparing a wedding. We will try our best to squeeze in everything to fit our budget.

3. savings and investments

We are now searching for investment opportunities.

I think improving our skills is a great experience.

4. house... house.. house...

Getting married means living together and we definitely need a roof over our heads. But, before anything else we must finish the drawing details of our "dream house".

Our Personal Goals

Mine His

1. to enroll in a short course 1. to enroll in a short course

2. driving lessons + driver's license 2. driving lessons + driver's license

(with special requests, I will be his teacher)

Hoping and praying to continue this tradition - sharing our aspirations and dreams. ^_^

"Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this." -Psalm 37:4-5

The victory of success is half won when one gains the habit of setting goals and achieving them. Even the most tedious chore will become endurable as you parade through each day convinced that every task, no matter how menial or boring, brings you closer to fulfilling your dreams. Og Mandino (1923 - 1996)